Fibre Optic Connectivity Solutions Home AboveNet UK AboveNet France AboveNet Germany AboveNet Amsterdam

AboveNet News

November 11, 2010
AboveNet Expands High Bandwidth Services Portfolio in London
More>

November 8, 2010
AboveNet Connects with CENX to Expand High Bandwidth Network
More>

September 20, 2010
AboveNet Expands to key European Markets
More>

June 16, 2010
AboveNet's secure fibre network connects to London's Telehouse West data centre
More>

June 7, 2010
AboveNet Expands Metro Portfolio with Launch of Core Wave Services
More>

More News

Search News

 

oakley rx men's optical frames,oakley optical glasses

We use the term "successful" loosely, since he didn't exactly "survive" it, but he was still pretty close. And since history books are like horseshoes and hand grenades in that "close enough" usually counts (we're looking at you Thomas Edison), Magellan gets full credit. He not only found a route to the East, he also took invaluable surveys of his route, documenting things like the Strait of Magellan and the Magellanic Penguin. He, uh. he really took advantage of that whole "if you're the first to see it, then you get to name it" thing didn't he? Please Magellanites, throw down your Magellan sticks and get off of Magellan Beach! Not only was the alleged native freakishly tall, he was also "dancing, singing, and throwing dust on his head," which is probably a 16th century euphemism for "acting totally stupid." So Magellan and company recorded meeting the world's first tribe of gargantuan naked ravers and, oakley optical glasses because the world was a "simpler" place back then, everyone just took his word that enormous dirt heads populated the tip of South America. And they continued to take his word for 200 years. It gets better when you find out that Magellan dubbed this fictional race of huge idiots the Patagons, a name that stuck for the entire area for quite some time. As in, to this very fucking day. Patagonia: It's like a whole country of Karl Malones. What really gets our goat is that Magellan probably did meet a tribe of natives on the tip of South America, but they already had a name. They were the Tehuelche tribe and they probably averaged a towering 5'11. That was slightly tall by European standards of the day, but by no means giant. However, when you came back from traversing the great unknown, and all you have to regale the court with are your tales of people who were "kind of tall" and "didn't have an exceptional amount of dirt on their heads," you're going to lose your audience pretty fast. The Amazon River is the largest river in the world. It was once surrounded by a rainforest full of hostile natives, not to mention some of the most oakley rx men's optical frames horrifying creatures ever designed by the twisted hand of a mad God. So surely the first person to navigate the entire river was some sort of big cajoned Adonis, right? Oh! That actually wasn't disappointing! All right then! This grizzled motherfucker right here is Fransisco de Orellana. Charged with exploring the Coca River, Orellana and his men decided, much like The Grateful Dead, to just keep on truckin' even when the Coca ran out. As a result of their audacity, they navigated the Amazon River in two months. His violent encounters with characters from Greek mythology. In ancient Greek stories, the Amazons were an entirely female nation of warriors who disposed of male children and cut off their right breasts in order to shoot bows and spears better. So how did a river on the other side of the planet get named after Mediterranean femi Nazis? Simple. Francisco de Orellana fought some dudes with long hair on his voyage. Not large, one breasted women. Not even a tribe composed entirely of women. Likely not even a single woman, actually. The warriors that he mistook as savage tribes of mythological female warriors were most probably Icamiabas, a tribe of South American natives who didn't take kindly to white guys establishing a Spanish colonial presence on their river. Which wasn't, obviously, called the Amazon at that point. Orellana named it that later, because he was the kind of guy you didn't fuck with. Because if you did, he'd convince the entire world that your band of fierce, macho warriors were just angry Greek lesbians. "I'm sorry, did you say something? I can name this river Fagtonia if you want. Yeah? Thought not."Sir Walter Raleigh Makes All of Europe Believe That South Americans Don't Have Heads A race of freakshow monstrosities, and a city made entirely out of gold. Once he was done adventurin' in the Colonies, Raleigh wandered down to Orellena's River of Fancyboys, the Amazon. Rolling with the joke, he confirmed de Orellana's fantasy that the forest was populated by one breasted man haters, then straight made up his own creatures to get the folks at home super excited about the strange and magical place he hoped to get lots of funding to visit over and over again. The people he reported finding there were equal parts Marvel Comics' Modok and Clive Barker's Cenobites; he called them the Ewaipanoma and described them as having "eyes in their shoulders, and their mouths in the middle of their breasts, and that a long train of hair groweth backward between their shoulders." And lo, did they loveth BDSM as much as they hateth Captain America. As we're sure you've inferred by now, historians call it a bunch of hogwash. It also doesn't help his case any that he didn't actually write the tale in detail until about 20 years later, after Pocahontas (the only person who could corroborate) was dead. But Smith established himself as a crackerjack liar well before he even got to the New World, with a story that's just as disputed and 100 times more ludicrously badass. Before he was a colonizer, Smith was a womanizer. Also, a full on pirate. During his "adventures," he claimed he was captured by some Turks, where he immediately did what we'd all do: behead three of them. Also, a Transylvanian prince rewarded him for their severed noggins with the title of "English Gentleman" (because Transylvanian princes totally had that kind of influence over England). Oh, and then Smith was sold into slavery! Oh no! But he for reals ex scaped by like, totally seducing his lady master, and then, and then he like, he fought and killed her brother (probably with like, this sweet jumpkick!) and escaped! God he's so cool! The only reason he didn't go to prom (a bunch of girls asked him) is because he was under arrest for illegal motorcycle racing (which he won). According to his book, he did a lot of really cool stuff like play the hero in an important battle, become a personal emissary for Kublai Kahn, and even govern a large Chinese city. And all this stuff was generally accepted, until historians started thinking about it. At all. So when they decided to verify his claims and began looking at the Chinese records, they realized that his story had more holes in it than a teenage girl trying to get her parents to notice her. "I want one right through my eyeball!" Hey, you know what? Chinese people, being one of the most advanced societies on Earth at the time, actually wrote stuff down! As it turns out, Polo places himself in a battle that ended one or two years before he got there . He also claimed he was the governor of somebody recorded his name even once on a payroll or a check or a diary or. no? Nothing? Not one single record of Marco Polo in Yang Chou, or in China, period? In fact, when experts began considering all the utterly Chinese things that Polo didn't mention, like calligraphy, tea, the printing press and the Great fucking Wall, it started to look like Marco Polo at all. He's probably just a guy who heard a lot of stories about the place and put them into a book. Then made himself the main character, a hero, a ruler and a badass, stopping just short of dutifully recording the time he single handedly beat back the Mongol hordes with his giant, giant dong.

oakley rx men's optical frames,oakley optical glasses

 

oakley sunglasses jupiter valentino rossi,oakley sunglasses jacket for men
oakley sunglasses jupiter valentino rossi,oakley sunglasses jacket for men

new oakley radarlock path oo9181,oakley mainlink steel w
new oakley radarlock path oo9181,oakley mainlink steel w

how to replace nose pads on oakley sunglasses,how to replace nose pads on oakley whisker
how to replace nose pads on oakley sunglasses,how to replace nose pads on oakley whisker

how to change oakley flight deck lenses,oakley flight deck xm prizm torch
how to change oakley flight deck lenses,oakley flight deck xm prizm torch

oakley crosshair 2.0 lenses polarized,oakley crosshair sunglasses men
oakley crosshair 2.0 lenses polarized,oakley crosshair sunglasses men

oakley prescription glasses hawaii,oakley prescription glasses hurt ears
oakley prescription glasses hawaii,oakley prescription glasses hurt ears

oakley oo4062 daisy chain 60 bronze green sunglasses,oakley 60
oakley oo4062 daisy chain 60 bronze green sunglasses,oakley 60

oakley flip down baseball sunglasses,oakley baseball sunglasses fake
oakley flip down baseball sunglasses,oakley baseball sunglasses fake

barbara oakley profiles,interview with barbara oakley
barbara oakley profiles,interview with barbara oakley

oakley ks truck repair,oakley ks tax rate
oakley ks truck repair,oakley ks tax rate

 

 

 

 

 

AboveNet Promotions

AboveNet Webinars

London Network Map

Quick Links

Contact Sales

Contact Sales

UK
[email protected]
+44 (0)20 7220 3822

France
[email protected]
+33 1 77 61 24 23

Germany
[email protected]
+49 163 66 00 00 8

The Netherlands
[email protected]
+31 631 76 631 9

European Partner Programme
[email protected]
+44 (0)20 7220 4355



Contact Support

Network Management Centre (NMC):
0800 169 1646 (UK)
+1 888 636 2778 (Outside of UK)

Technical Support Email:
[email protected]